Category Humour/Satire

Life is sweet

Working for the Finance department feels ah-mazzinnngg. No more standing all day long. I am not scared anymore of the probability of a drunk local taking out a gun and shooting me. Or driving his car through the main door. (That actually happened). No more starting your shift when people are ending theirs. And always […]

The 30 day cake story

So, there was a cake in my fridge. I assume it was caramel. It was untouched. It was for the birthday of a housemate. And it was living in the fridge for one month. I say living because it had acquired a housemate status by now. When I came back from Tbilisi, I was absolutely […]

#Areyoukiddingme?

Today, I saw an email sent by one of important people that work for the company. The email is very nice, very professional, great ideas, yada yada yada. Except for one problem: The email has hashtags in it. For some reason. I am confused. It is an OFFICIAL email.  It is sent to EMPLOYEES, NOT […]

That’s racist, said the racist

Racist customers be like: “I did not feel welcome at your hotel. Your staff made me feel unwelcome at your hotel. Is it because I am (insert nationality)? Your staff is very racist! I also think you have too many Indian stuff that you should get rid off. They are completely disaster!“. So you want […]

I am not your “Bro”

To people who are texting me and ending their sentences with “bro”: You are annoying the fuck out of me. Just because I don’t say it out loud doesn’t mean you can use it multiple times in sentences. My one word replies should tell you that I really want to block you but I am […]

MUST STOP TALKING

I work in the hospitality industry and because of this unfortunate circumstance I am expected to be nice to people because I have “PEOPLE’S SKILLS”. WHATEVER THAT MEANS. Every day I have to make a choice: to live up to the expectation of others or to disappoint them greatly. It’s a very hard choice to […]

Can’t think of a title ATM

Hell-O. I just wanted to say.. I have good days and bad days at work. The bad days are when I feel like I work in a brothel. The good days are when I feel like I don't work in a brothel, that I work in a mental asylum with the staff being more mental […]

Raise your hand if you can’t swim

So if you didn’t know this, I should tell you now: I don’t know how to swim. Why? No one was bothered to teach me. And I never was interested. But I thought that it is high time I should learn to swim. Who knows, if war breaks out I might have to swim across […]

How I feel about “Feels”

I feel that Calvin Harris should no longer be allowed to make music. First of all, I don’t know why all of it sounds so good. I don’t know what secret formula he has to make such catchy songs. Second of all, his latest song “Feels” should be banned. I can’t sleeep, I can’t go […]

My AC is shitting ice

Fasting in Qatar is way better than fasting in Pakistan. No matter how hot it is outside, inside your home, your office, your car you always have one thing to count on: AC Unless you have my luck and your AC gives up on you.  Ramzan has crazily messed up my scheduled. I wake up […]

Optimism 

Hoping the giant zit on your chin will disappear just because it’s shoot day at work and all the pictures taken today would be displayed on your international website and stay there for years.. The zit may disappear tomorrow but not today..

Praablam customer

I am thinking of suggesting my training manager to send our employees to Karwa’s main office, in order to better our customer service skills. Have you ever been in a Karwa? I am in awe of the way they treat their customers!* I recently took a trip to Villagio and decided to visit one of […]

Pride and language

Two people from Mecaland having dinner in a restaurant. Man 1: “How was your weekend with your family?” Man 2: “Oh it was very enjoyable! I didn’t know staying at a hotel could be so much fun. I mean, forget the clean bedsheets and the 24/7 room service. I had so much fun tormenting the […]

High moment 

When you’re so depressed about life that the highest moment of the day is that you own the same piece of clothing as one of the stars from your favourite show. I don’t even like her. But her wardrobe is SPOT ON.

Don’t be that customer..

  And ff you’re having a coughing fit, the least you can do is cover your mouth. And that’s not just being a good customer, that’s called having manners. Thank you.