Cuninglingus(almost) at work

Note: This post was originally titled Bonding with you boss but I changed it to Cuninglingus at work to attract all you naughty people. Ha ha.
I never have a dull day at work. NEVER. No matter how bad my day is going, there will be always something  happening to make me laugh like a hyena and with tears (sad or happy- I am still contemplating)

If you want an entertaining work life, forget the entertainment industry, work for a hotel instead.
You will always find something ridiculous to make your day

Like the fact that the upper management consumes half of the coffee in the hotel. So much so that if we were charging for this consumption, the revenue would go through the roof. I know it says that you are entitled to three cups of coffee on your contract but really, do you really have to consume all three when all you do is sit in your fucking chair all day?

Oh I am sorry, I forgot. There are three other things that you do everyday as well.
1. Suck the positive energy out of everyone. All the time. 

2. Except those who belong to the same country as you. You favour your kabayans all the time.

 I am so glad cuninglingus is not  allowed at work because you are one step away from doing just that.

3. Deliver a sermon (or pre work briefing as you call it) which consists of nothing but unrealistic bullshit that you feed us. 

“Go the extra mile for your customer!( but be prepared to answer an unlimited amount of questions and investigations into your action because they got so much time fo’ dat)

Fuck that shit.

If you feel the same as me, chances are you and your boss need to work on your relationship. This will include you spending time together so that you can bond over common interests thereby being better able to understand each other. 

I have thought long and hard about this and here are my suggestions:

1) Invite him for a friendly game of baseball.

2) Every once in a while, offer him a treat:

3) Invite him to a game of laser tag but take an actual gun instead:

I think no. 2 is most effective but no. 1 is so tempting. Isn’t it? What do u think?


Your thoughts?

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s